It’s currently 4:17 am at our house. I’ll sum the reason I’m up by saying that croup is not fun. I have three seriously sick kids, but once again, Elanor gets the prize for most sick, having awakened at 2:30 am with a cough that would make a seal wince. All three kids have had fevers around 103 degrees, Amaryah for …let’s see, about two days now. I’m hoping she’s on the mend –just went in to feel her forehead, and she’s not “flaming” anymore, as Elanor said earlier today, as in “Mom, Amaryah’s flaming!”
I won’t make this long, because I know from having sick kids before to get my sleep when I can, and they’re all back to sleep now. Basically, I feel like God’s been asking me lately, in light of all the stress and weirdness that’s been going on in the last two years, “So, what if this is normal from now on? What if nothing changes?” I’ve written before about material and financial contentment, but I’ve never really extrapolated that into just plain situational contentment. I’ve had this attitude for the last couple years that’s ranged between feeling like God has been beating up on us and feeling like He’s just teaching us something to be used later on. I’ve never really considered that maybe this is just life, and I’m not entitled to having everything easy just because that’s how it appears everyone else around me has it. I’m beginning to wrap myself around the idea that if I really do believe God is in control, I need to let go of my sense of entitlement and expectation for things to have happy endings (or even happy processes) all the time. That’s basically it, I guess. I should go back to bed. If I think of a better way to expand on this, I’ll do it later.